Dude, You're Unglued
by Kevin Salveson
Dude,
you're unglued!
Get a grip
on the ice chest
and pass me a brew.
It's not happening
so go ahead and grapple.
All snap and no tap?
Buy yourself a clue.
She doesn't want you.
The last time you two screwed
was in forever and a blue moon.
Far as I'm concerned,
the story's over.
Don't waste my time with your
mealy mouthed blubber
Oh lover, lover!
You're slobbering.
Don't you mean
mother mother?
Better watch out or
this'll be the fappening.
Here's the bottle opener
and a bagful of rubbers.
Its Laughlin, Nevada;
go knock yourself out.
Get out and go clubbing,
you're ten types of fug.
Go scout for a strumpet
a rub and a tug.
Pop for a muppet
'til your dumb member's numb,
over and overkill
'til you or forever comes
Ok now don't stew.
Get a grip on the ice chest
and pass me a brew!